Satan? Ego? Useful or Faulty Design?

I have been observing myself as a spiritual practice. Trying to “remember myself” as Gurdjieff would say it, call upon the “witness” or “observer”. Be awake. Either way, I have noticed something remarkable about myself: see if you can relate.

When I am in front of my computer* (where I spend most of my day) and I encounter something that requires the slightest push on my end, I see myself automatically going to the computer game of my choice, freecell.

I began observing this phenomenon about 6 months ago (it was there, unobserved, for many years). But 4 days ago I decided to employ “restriction,” which is one of Kabbalah’s main tenets, and see what will happen.

For about 36 hours I closed the freecell program as soon as I opened it. Then every time I was “awake” which means I was by myself and I was still observing myself. On the other hand, every time I was on the phone, or watching a video on my computer, or listening to an audio file, my attention wasn’t on myself, and I played… until I “woke up.”

Still curious, more interested in the experiment than conquering the force that moves my hand, I saw something today that is worth sharing.

Since I have started this blog, I have been watching how I somehow leak the energy that is necessary for creative thinking and expression… by talking on the phone, by playing freecell.

Every occasion when I need the little push and I opt to play instead, two things happen: 1. I have diminished the internal discomfort 2. I have successfully diverted my attention from what is important to me.

The first one is good, right? Who would want to be uncomfortable, after all.

SOURCE: click to continue reading Satan? Ego? Useful or Faulty Design?

Satan? Ego? Useful or Faulty Design?

I have been observing myself as a spiritual practice. Trying to “remember myself” as Gurdjieff would say it, call upon the “witness” or “observer”. Be awake. Either way, I have noticed something remarkable about myself: see if you can relate.

When I am in front of my computer* (where I spend most of my day) and I encounter something that requires the slightest push on my end, I see myself automatically going to the computer game of my choice, freecell.

I began observing this phenomenon about 6 months ago (it was there, unobserved, for many years). But 4 days ago I decided to employ “restriction,” which is one of Kabbalah’s main tenets, and see what will happen.

For about 36 hours I closed the freecell program as soon as I opened it. Then every time I was “awake” which means I was by myself and I was still observing myself. On the other hand, every time I was on the phone, or watching a video on my computer, or listening to an audio file, my attention wasn’t on myself, and I played… until I “woke up.”

Still curious, more interested in the experiment than conquering the force that moves my hand, I saw something today that is worth sharing.

Since I have started this blog, I have been watching how I somehow leak the energy that is necessary for creative thinking and expression… by talking on the phone, by playing freecell.

Every occasion when I need the little push and I opt to play instead, two things happen: 1. I have diminished the internal discomfort 2. I have successfully diverted my attention from what is important to me.

The first one is good, right? Who would want to be uncomfortable, after all.

SOURCE: click to continue reading Satan? Ego? Useful or Faulty Design?

Addictive Tendencies in Sharing The Light


Yehuda Berg writes:
There are people in our lives who don’t want to receive what we have to give them. …

… we invest efforts into keeping some relationhships burning in our lives that we’d be better off letting burn out.

… life is all about circuitry. When we share our Light with people who don’t want to receive it, it’s like trying to fill a bottle when the cap is still on. Try as you might, with all of the love, intention, and desire to share, your energy simply cannot penetrate. And as with our favorite spiritual illustration, the lightbulb, if the negative pole is blocked, the circuit cannot be completed, and the energy cannot flow.

It’s not about judging people as worthy or unworthy. It’s about discerning who is ‘open’ to receive, and willing to use what we have to offer – wisdom, love, time, concern – no matter what flavor!
No doubt, if you go through your relationships, in your mind, one by one, you are going find several that fit the above description: Your desire to contribute to them is not received with an equal amount of desire to receive from you.

Some people, including my older self,

SOURCE: click to continue reading Addictive Tendencies in Sharing The Light

Addictive Tendencies in Sharing The Light


Yehuda Berg writes:
There are people in our lives who don’t want to receive what we have to give them. …

… we invest efforts into keeping some relationhships burning in our lives that we’d be better off letting burn out.

… life is all about circuitry. When we share our Light with people who don’t want to receive it, it’s like trying to fill a bottle when the cap is still on. Try as you might, with all of the love, intention, and desire to share, your energy simply cannot penetrate. And as with our favorite spiritual illustration, the lightbulb, if the negative pole is blocked, the circuit cannot be completed, and the energy cannot flow.

It’s not about judging people as worthy or unworthy. It’s about discerning who is ‘open’ to receive, and willing to use what we have to offer – wisdom, love, time, concern – no matter what flavor!
No doubt, if you go through your relationships, in your mind, one by one, you are going find several that fit the above description: Your desire to contribute to them is not received with an equal amount of desire to receive from you.

Some people, including my older self,

SOURCE: click to continue reading Addictive Tendencies in Sharing The Light

Stay Open In The Pain


Our spiritual work is to grow more connected to others around us. Our obstacle to building bridges to other people is stored hurt. Perceived or real… When we don’t resolve conflicts in our relationships, our lives can’t move forward.

Today, tell your boyfriend or boss or brother exactly what you want, what you feel, what you think. You are going to worry about what they will say or think. And honestly, that’s the work. Just expose yourself and be vulnerable. Ask the Light to give you the strength to stay open in the pain.

Your soul will love you for having the courage to speak up.

You see, pain is inevitable in life. No matter where or when you were born, your financial situation, your family situation, whether you are fat or thin, sick or healthy, loved or despised… pain is inevitable.

Mind you, suffering is optional… and while it is true, this is not

SOURCE: click to continue reading Stay Open In The Pain

What’s the meaning (purpose) of life

The two sources that helped me define what life could mean to me are Wallace D. Wattles and The Zohar, the definitive book of Kabbalah.

According to Wallace D. Wattles (of The Science of Getting Rich fame) is that life wants more life, and your job (YOU! Human Being) is to align yourself with that. More life means being able to have all the tools that you are capable of using, being on the cutting edge of thinking, etc. This has been really very inspiring to me.

I have worded this MY WAY: our job is to be God’s self-expression. God doesn’t have a thumb, but we do. And we are causing full self-expression to God when we use what we were blessed with, our bodies, our minds, our emotions.

Kabbalah is similar, in a way, saying that human beings are a part of the vessel the Light created (eons ago) to receive all its blessings, but (unfortunately and unintentionally) the Light’s desire to give got transmitted with the light that was giving fulfillment to the vessel, and at some point the vessel said: I don’t want to eat bread of shame any more, I want to be able to earn the light I receive, and be a giver, not just a receiver.

That is what caused the physical universe to spring into place, so that the vessel, (that broke into chards into the billions of souls) can earn its light in an environment of seeming scarcity, by becoming like god: giving of themselves.

Of course, physicality and scarcity are powerful forces, so it is not easy for the souls to “tame” their physical hosts… and only very few people in every generation elevate themselves much on the scale of 0-1000 (100% scarcity/ego to close to godliness).

So, in my life, this moment to moment to moment transformation of the selfishness and the full expression of what’s god (without being religious) is the purpose of living, i.e. the meaning I give to life.

And by selfishness I don’t necessarily mean material selfishness: generosity of heart is the opposite: I want for everyone what I want for myself. But I won’t give it to them and I won’t do it FOR them. I inspire them… by MY ACTIONS.

Now, this is a full blog-post… where is my blog… darn… when I need it? lol

Sophie Benshitta Maven

SOURCE: click to continue reading What’s the meaning (purpose) of life

What’s the meaning (purpose) of life

The two sources that helped me define what life could mean to me are Wallace D. Wattles and The Zohar, the definitive book of Kabbalah.

According to Wallace D. Wattles (of The Science of Getting Rich fame) is that life wants more life, and your job (YOU! Human Being) is to align yourself with that. More life means being able to have all the tools that you are capable of using, being on the cutting edge of thinking, etc. This has been really very inspiring to me.

I have worded this MY WAY: our job is to be God’s self-expression. God doesn’t have a thumb, but we do. And we are causing full self-expression to God when we use what we were blessed with, our bodies, our minds, our emotions.

Kabbalah is similar, in a way, saying that human beings are a part of the vessel the Light created (eons ago) to receive all its blessings, but (unfortunately and unintentionally) the Light’s desire to give got transmitted with the light that was giving fulfillment to the vessel, and at some point the vessel said: I don’t want to eat bread of shame any more, I want to be able to earn the light I receive, and be a giver, not just a receiver.

That is what caused the physical universe to spring into place, so that the vessel, (that broke into chards into the billions of souls) can earn its light in an environment of seeming scarcity, by becoming like god: giving of themselves.

Of course, physicality and scarcity are powerful forces, so it is not easy for the souls to “tame” their physical hosts… and only very few people in every generation elevate themselves much on the scale of 0-1000 (100% scarcity/ego to close to godliness).

So, in my life, this moment to moment to moment transformation of the selfishness and the full expression of what’s god (without being religious) is the purpose of living, i.e. the meaning I give to life.

And by selfishness I don’t necessarily mean material selfishness: generosity of heart is the opposite: I want for everyone what I want for myself. But I won’t give it to them and I won’t do it FOR them. I inspire them… by MY ACTIONS.

Now, this is a full blog-post… where is my blog… darn… when I need it? lol

Sophie Benshitta Maven

SOURCE: click to continue reading What’s the meaning (purpose) of life

What’s the meaning (purpose) of life

The two sources that helped me define what life could mean to me are Wallace D. Wattles and The Zohar, the definitive book of Kabbalah.

According to Wallace D. Wattles (of The Science of Getting Rich fame) is that life wants more life, and your job (YOU! Human Being) is to align yourself with that. More life means being able to have all the tools that you are capable of using, being on the cutting edge of thinking, etc. This has been really very inspiring to me.

I have worded this MY WAY: our job is to be God’s self-expression. God doesn’t have a thumb, but we do. And we are causing full self-expression to God when we use what we were blessed with, our bodies, our minds, our emotions.

Kabbalah is similar, in a way, saying that human beings are a part of the vessel the Light created (eons ago) to receive all its blessings, but (unfortunately and unintentionally) the Light’s desire to give got transmitted with the light that was giving fulfillment to the vessel, and at some point the vessel said: I don’t want to eat bread of shame any more, I want to be able to earn the light I receive, and be a giver, not just a receiver.

That is what caused the physical universe to spring into place, so that the vessel, (that broke into chards into the billions of souls) can earn its light in an environment of seeming scarcity, by becoming like god: giving of themselves.

Of course, physicality and scarcity are powerful forces, so it is not easy for the souls to “tame” their physical hosts… and only very few people in every generation elevate themselves much on the scale of 0-1000 (100% scarcity/ego to close to godliness).

So, in my life, this moment to moment to moment transformation of the selfishness and the full expression of what’s god (without being religious) is the purpose of living, i.e. the meaning I give to life.

And by selfishness I don’t necessarily mean material selfishness: generosity of heart is the opposite: I want for everyone what I want for myself. But I won’t give it to them and I won’t do it FOR them. I inspire them… by MY ACTIONS.

Now, this is a full blog-post… where is my blog… darn… when I need it? lol

Sophie Benshitta Maven

SOURCE: click to continue reading What’s the meaning (purpose) of life

Feel Well to Do Well

First was the word… remember?

I know, I know, talk is cheap. But is it?

I am not talking about boasting, false promising, buttering up, etc. I am talking about all the times when you “just” talk. When you think you are describing how it is. When you think you are telling the truth. When you do your darndest best to describe reality… I am talking about that talking.

The words you use, the pictures you paint do not describe anything. They, instead, create. For you and for others.

When the media screams: there  is recession, they are painting pictures. When you tell someone stories to make them feel better but talk about somber stories with unhappy endings, you are painting pictures of gloom and doom in their world that, unless they are really careful, they will manifest, no kidding.

When you say “I want to lose weight” the picture of you running fast enough that the “weight” stays behind, but the moment you slow down so you can live, the weight catches up with you… have you noticed? If not in your life, in others?

When you say “I have to go to work” you are painting the picture of a prison with no joy, no freedom, no self-expression, no creativity… is this what you want half of your awake time to become? Oh, it already has? No wonder…

If you want to do well, you need to feel well. If you want to feel well, you need to use words that manifest that reality… remember parallel realities? Every word creates — or not — a parallel reality.

Most of us are stuck in a gloom and doom reality. There is a book title, Why you are sick, broke and dumb… or something like that. Can you see that a simple shift in the use of your words could take you to well, prosperous and gloriously bright?

You decide, and you are even motivated for a day, maybe even a week, then it goes away.

What’s the trick for staying motivated?

SOURCE: click to continue reading Feel Well to Do Well

Regrets, Resentments, and other vicious Life-Killers


Regrets, I’ve had a few … .How many of us are stuck in ruts because we cling to past slights, traumas, missed opportunities, and betrayals? The best way to let go and move forward is to acknowledge and accept those negative things you did (or had done to you) as steps on the path that brought you to where you need to be today.

Today, recall the pain of your past. Allow yourself to get to the point where you can accept that they were blessings; the perfect things that helped you build a new you. If you can release your grip on the anger, sadness, and regret, then it will be easier to spot the Light in the darkness. (quoted from daily kabbalah tuneup)
Interesting that this would come up just now.

I am working with a client/friend, let’s call her DD. She has been doing great. She has gotten in touch with the light in herself and her power to choose.

She is severely overweight and it’s effecting her overall health, but more than anything, her self image.

This past week she has gotten hungry twice while she was doing errands, and she didn’t give in to the temptation to get a quick supersized meal at the many fast food places on her way… instead she drove home and ate what she had planned to eat that day. Major victory.

The effect on her self esteem, self image was dramatic. She suddenly could see the light at the end of the tunnel, both in regards to regaining her health, and in regards to making a living, being a good parent, loving herself.

Her capacity to face what she didn’t like about herself increased to a point where

SOURCE: click to continue reading Regrets, Resentments, and other vicious Life-Killers