This article is not about the “love” you, or Wikipedia call love… it’s about another love… What we customarily call love is a “hardware-based need”, the need to make our genes to survive in some offspring. And some of us may call the need for pleasure, the need to get rid of the unpleasant guiding feeling of “horniness” love. Those are misnomers, dressing something as something else… prettier.
Most people have plenty of sex, no love. Some people have no sex, and plenty of love.
The two needs are not connected.
The need for love is a group of needs really. The need for a group, the need to belong. The need for someone who is on your side. But more importantly the need for someone who helps you fulfill, satisfy the “software-based needs” of the need to meet others’ expectation, and the need to fulfill your own expectation.
Those needs not fulfilled cause an overall unhappiness and hopelessness. The state Thoreau called “quiet desperation”. No one who fulfills those needs is in quiet desperation. We all need help… this is what this article is about. It’s about how love IS the fourth pillar of the good life, without which the other three don’t matter. It’s about how to have love be the source of power, courage, so you can go for all the good stuff you want.